Welcome to Inertia Travel Solutions

Good Morning.

Or should I say afternoon?*

As you may know, Inertia has won the prestigious franchise to run your rail service.

Who are Inertia? Older readers may remember us from a previous incarnation, Inertia Travel. Some of your may remember when we were Inertia Systems. Before that we were Track Rail in partnership with Fare Queue. And of course, grandad will remember us from the days were were plain old Brutish Rail.

We've come a long way since then. Many of our drivers and support staff have gone, sadly. Those are the commercial realities of today's highly competitive market. But on a happier note, we have added many more brand alignment specialists, and marketing gurus to our team.

Of course, we can't please everyone. We know that. There will always be people who just want to turn up at a railway station and get on a train. There will be people who want their train to arrive exactly at the time mentioned on the timetable. And there will be those, usually people who don't even travel by train, who want to know when we're holding an inquiry into our latest train crash.

Don't feel sorry for us though. We're tough. Never complain, never explain, that is the motto of Inertia travel solutions. We won't listen to complaints. And we certainly won't be explaining ourselves. What would be the point? We have record profits to count. In that respect, we are probably victims of our own success.

Like John Reid, we're prepared to say we'll work 24 bloody hours a day to make this train company work. For you. For your children. And your children's children.

The profits we make are put to good use. We are constantly lobbying the government to get a better deal for our customers, and indeed for ourselves. These negotiations are finally beginning to pay off. Recently, our chairman Lord Sle'aze, was offered one of the finest honours that money can buy.

Inertia Travel Solutions is a world class, fit for purpose transportation solution that is the envy of the world. And I make no apologies for that! This is a tremendous achievement that, going forward, we intend to build on.


Stoopy De Gunt,
director of brand alignment,
Inertia Trains.







(*Inertia Travels Solutions in Partnership would like to apologise for the late running of your service.)